Q and A

Elmer,

Why isn’t ACNRA on facebook or Linkedin?

Reed Benson
Peoria, IL

Reed,

I am so discouraged by how the internet can mangle a message that I feel exposing ACNRA on such a social network could lead to hackings or disruption from those who oppose our views. It really upsets me how our previous website has morphed into such a disgusting display of pornography that I can’t imagine giving someone that opportunity again. This is the only place to receive our unaltered message. Once again, I would like to stress that if you haven’t done so already, please remove the previous web address from your list of favorites as what it has become certainly has nothing to do with me or the core beliefs of ACNRA and it’s affiliates.

Dear Elmer,

Would you be willing to conduct my wedding on June 8th, 2013 here in Michigan? My fiancee and I would really love for you to introduce us as man and wife.

Pat Gershaw
Traverse City, MI

Pat,

At this time, I would have to turn down the opportunity to perform the wedding ceremony, but you are not the only person who has asked me Pat. I am very flattered by these offers and would gladly record an audio or video message to play for guests either during the wedidng or reception. I’ve already sent Pat some rates, but I get this request so often that if you are interested, please send me an e-mail at my e-mail address elmergodstone@yahoo.com

 

 

Dear Elmer,

My family is dying to know if the police or fire department ever discovered the cause of the fire two years ago? I hadn’t heard any updates since last fall.

Benjamin Weston
Huber Ridge, OH

 

Benjamin,
Thank you for your interest. First off, I would like to suggest you remove the term “dying to know” from your vocabulary as it seems quite extreme and I feel that gossip is unbecoming. Unfortunately, the fire continues to be a sore subject for my family and many of the ACNRA elders. Apparently, there were indications of “accelerants”, which makes the authorities believe that the fire was an example of arson. There have been no suspects and while it is impossible that someone involved with ACNRA would set the fire, the possibility that it was an insider is all the insurance company needs to withhold the money that should be rightfully ours so we can continue spreading our message of worship. It seems that the police have given up the search to find the monster who did this to our beautiful structure, but just like Lazarus, our primary facility will rise again albeit in a different state.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Elmer,

I’ve worked for my employer for over 15 years and recently I was passed over for a promotion which went to a co-worker who has been here for half that time.  This employee is also several years younger than me and I have a hard time taking direction from him knowing that I should have that role.  What can be done to improve this situation?

Andrew S.

New Brunswick, New Jersey

Andrew,

Sorry to hear that you did not get the position you were hoping for but in the economy that our Islamic president  has created you should still be appreciative that you are employed.  Before you continue down your path of anger, look inside and question why you might have been passed over?  Is there something in your pattern of work where is apparent to your superiors that you aren’t giving maximum effort?  At the same time, what makes the man who got the job better than you?  Is a better leader?  Is he better respected by your fellow co-workers?  I doubt that this is the first opportunity you’ve had for advancement in your many years and it is most likely that you have climbed a ladder into the position you have now.  Certainly a chance will come again and now is the time to retrace your steps, survey the landscape and prepare for the next crack at it.

Dear Elmer,

I recently purchased a shirt from a local store along with several other items.  When the cashier rang up my bill, it seemed short but I figured that maybe some items were on sale.  When I looked at the receipt when I got home, I noticed that the cashier had forgot to scan the shirt.  Later that day, I tried on the shirt and realized that it was a tight fit and had a small hole near the bottom.  Should I pay for the shirt only so I can return it or keep this to myself?

Kim Fields

High Springs, Florida

Kim,

Judging from your letter, it appears that you are well-aware that currently stand as an accidental thief.  You have an item that you don’t want, but you didn’t pay for it so you don’t think it is worth the effort to explain the situation to the store. First off, I’m a trusting man, but I do wonder if your story about the shirt not fitting and having a hole in it is maybe an excuse to try to justify not returning the shirt.  If you are fabricating the story in hopes of me telling you that you might as well just keep the shirt, that is worrisome and you should feel guilty.

At the same time, if you are being honest I guess the greater question is what type of store was it that you purchased this at?  From your letter, it sounds like it might be a larger chain or department store in which case they are prepared and expect to have mis-scans and theft take place.  The cost to a larger store of a cashier making a mistake is minimal considering the discount prices they are able to purchase the items from to sell in their store.  If you are dealing with a smaller operation that maybe only operates a store or two ranging to maybe a handful in the state, I suggest that you immediately take the shirt back and explain the situation.  It isn’t worth getting too stressed out over and whatever you decide to do, I think the nicest way to go about it would be for you to continue shopping at the store and spending enough to cover the difference.

_________________________________________________________

Dear Elmer,
My mother refuses to allow us to sell her house and move her into a nursing home.  It’s become all too clear that her mind is not what it used to be and that she needs help with the most basic functions.  I don’t want to get a lawyer but I don’t know what to do to try and help.

Peter Barkley
Pipestone, South Dakota

Peter,
One of the greatest challenges in a man’s life is when he realizes that his parents are no longer the authority figure and that he is the one who has assumed the role.  What makes it a true challenge is not only the reality of the situation but accepting the reality.  You said it yourself that your mother isn’t the same person upstairs, but because it is your mother, you still want to concede to her wishes.  Peter, you are the one in charge now.  When you were a little boy, I’m sure you begged your mother for sweets all the time and just because that is what you clamored for doesn’t mean that she gave in to you.  Now you’re the one with the power, so do get yourself a lawyer, go over the financials and get your mother to a place where she belongs before she hopefully makes her way to see the Heavenly Father.

Dear Elmer,
Sometimes when I’m praying, I hear a voice inside my head responding to the prayers.  I’m pretty sure it is just my subconscious responding to what I am asking for, but I want to believe that it is God talking to me.  As someone who has said that you’ve talked with God, I was wondering how that occurred and if there’s any validity to these encounters.

Shane Remnic
San Luis Obispo, CA

Shane,
First of all, leave all this psychology this or that out of the equation.  There is no so such thing as psychology.  If you’ve read the bible, you know that God is central to all truth.  Nowhere in the book does it say that God created man with layers in the brain and that there were different levels of truth  within each layer.  That’s not how God works and I’m disappointed that you would think that’s how he might try to communicate with you. 

Secondly, the method with which I speak and converse with the Creator is private and not something I share with anyone, even my wife.  If you are honored to speak with God, what is important should be the message and the lesson learned, not how he spoke with you.  

Taking these into account, I find it impossible that God has spoken with you.  And that little voice inside your head  responding to you is probably that of Satan.  Unlike God, who commands respect when he speaks, Satan weasels his way in through whispers and suggestions.  I’m not sure what you’re praying for, but if it is something that Hades seems to encourage, you might need to rethink what you’re asking God.  Instead of confronting Him with your problems, ask him to save you.

_________________________________________________________

Dear Elmer,

My son is a teenager and has indicated to me that his dream is to be an astronaut when he is an adult.  I have no idea how to react to this and was wondering if you had any advice how my wife and I should react to this revelation.

Andrew Zellmer

Fort Garland, Colorado

Andrew,

The first thing you need to ask yourself is what is your profession or what is your wife’s profession if she is working away from the home for some reason.  If you are an engineer or your wife is a receptionist in a medical field, it shouldn’t be surprising that your son would be inspired by the temptation of science and attracted by the allure of ascending past the heavens.  There are certain depths and heights man is not supposed to go, and clearly if space was supposed to be accessible, we would be able to breathe the air freely and not use a robotic suit.  I think that God expressed his feelings regarding space travel by giving us a warning with Apollo 13.  We refused to listen and he responded by destroying the Challenger, a shuttle that was living up to its name and challenging the one true authority.  Please tell your son that there is no place in this universe for his false ambition and reexamine your profession…are you serving anyone true through your work.  If not, why continue in your fallacy?

Dear Elmer,

Thank you for your words of wisdom over the years.  Since I can’t attend your church, I am currently attending Little River Baptist church in Ware Shoals, SC.  I am conflicted by their interpretation of the bible, but I find their church to be the most acceptable compared to those in the area.  My problem is that since I don’t feel the church is as effective as I desire it to be, I feel no need to provide in the weekly offerings.  I know I’ve received some sideways glances from members of the church, but I think giving the church money would only encourage them to continue down such an incorrect path.

Paul Reed

Ware Shoals, SC

Paul,

The first priority of any church should be to deliver the proper message of the lord’s word.  It is obvious that you are working on a higher plane, with a greater thirst for the truth of the good book.  You wouldn’t tip a waitress for continuing to bring out food that wasn’t cooked the right way, so why should you give money for a message you know isn’t correct?  It has been a trying time attempting to build a new church, but once we’ve established our new location, I think you should consider relocating so you can attend a place of worship that does things the right way.  As always, I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life, but I can sense the disappointment in your sentiment and hope to one day see you in the pews.

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